Midwesting it, Folks.
I’ve been away for five days and it feels like a month.
It’s been a great run. As I write this I am delayed at the airport in Minneapolis. The shows in Madison, Milwaukee, Chicago and here were great. Ali Macofsky did a great job opening and all the crowds were really perfect. If you came out for one of the shows, thanks.
I guess I never realized it before but traveling to a different city every day, either by plane or driving, is somehow exhausting. Even if you aren’t doing much.
Maybe I’m just making an excuse for not going to the gym in every city. I don’t know. Hotel gyms are pretty hit or miss. I can get in there sometimes but for the most part there is something existentially awful about them. A couple of the hotels we stayed at even had good ones. The one at the first hotel was big. There were probably seven treadmills and a few bikes, weights, mats, the whole deal. I was still the only one in there but it wasn’t as lonely and weird as the two treadmill hotel gym. For some reason when you are in a very small hotel gym on a treadmill it feels like you may be the last person on earth. All you are hoping for is that no one gets on that other treadmill. Too intimate, too weird. Like you and some stranger are trying to outrun death and neither of you is really getting anywhere.
Hold on, I think I see Kate Winslet in the Delta lounge here in Minneapolis. Is that even possible? Nope. Just a regular lady.
The vegan food situation on the road is becoming sort of a drag. A lot of fried stuff out there. So, I feel disgusting. The combination of not going to the gym in different cities and eating too much fried plant based mystery food or bread has left me feeling like a bloated, exhausted monster.
Is that Bryan Cranston? Wait, no. Just a regular guy.
I got up at six to get to the airport for a 9:25 flight that was delayed an hour. I’m starting to fade. That initial boost of wake up juice that got me up and out is wearing off. I’d like to think I’m generally pretty lucky with flights but that’s not really true. On our way out here we were in the air heading to Chicago when we got texts on our phones that our flight from Chicago to Madison had been canceled. I’m not sure why my manager booked that flight. It’s only a two hour drive. The plan was to rent a car in Madison to do the rest of the run. So, while in the air we were able to see if there were any other available flights. Ali was looped in on text. My manager was texting from New York. It didn’t seem possible to get on a plane so I decided to reserve a car in Chicago. We did all this while in the air!
I don’t express enough gratitude for technology for keeping me sane.
Ten years ago I wouldn’t have found out anything until I got off the plane, stood in front of the board and said, ‘Fuck! Canceled! It doesn’t even look that bad out. Fuck!’
Then the scramble to the American counter to find out there were no other planes. Then running to another airline to see if I could get on one that would be filled up. Then going out to Hertz not knowing whether they even had a car available and possibly spending the night at a sad airport hotel with a gym I wouldn’t even check out.
None of that happened. I mean, it happened in my head, but that’s different. Technology probably extended my life by alleviating that panic and anger.
Today I talk to Carol Burnett. I drove up to Montecito in pouring rain to talk to the legend. It was an honor meeting her and a great time doing research watching old shows. On Thursday I talk to comedian Alex Edelman about his new HBO special and Jews. Good week!
Enjoy!
Boomer, Monkey and LaFonda live!
Love,
Maron
